The Mason Dixon Line

I work in a small town in Tennessee an hour north of Memphis where I live.  To give you some background knowledge of myself I was born and raised in Memphis.  I lived with my grandmother and grandfather, along with my dad who was just across the street they were all originally Missourians.  Now to me, I had always thought I was pretty southern.  I "liked" sweet tea and other southern things, but you see as Paula Deen would say I was not "in love" with sweet tea, which of course is a southern thang.  Well, as many of you reading my blog are aware my parents divorced when I was seven and I never had too much to do with my mother's side of the family.  My dad's family being from the north I guess I was raised a bit confused as m husband says.  He also says the boot heel of Missouri didn't know if they were north or south then my family moved to Memphis and I'm just all mixed up.  Well, so what I don't have a distinct dialect, my husband sho nuf does.

Here's the deal, even though I work an hour north, I have never a day in my life had a southern drawl, I and for some reason those teachers do.  It's also an hour south of Missouri, so midway between Missouri and Memphis, TN.  About nine years ago I met my southern husband from Mississippi, and I mean the Delta, way south.  Greenville, MS he attended Delta State and was a KA, which of course kept up with all the southern traditions. 

I never noticed myself communicating differently with anyone I grew up in an all black neighborhood, I have numerous gay and lesbian friends, and of course I have gone to Missouri often to visit family.  No one had ever said anything about the way I sounded or the dialect I until Shane and I started dating and I began teaching.

So do I find myself communicating differently with people from different groups and cultures .. 

I do know, this was something that was brought to my attention by my sister first, then my husband, and later my colleagues.  If you could hear me I do not use a lot of southern words in conversation in general.  What I tend to do however, is talk with the language and dialect of the people in which I am speaking.   The people I work with, my colleagues, all have southern accents and use more southern dialect.  When I speak with them at work, over the phone, or over a meal I find myself using southern words.  I was accused of having a northern accent when I first began working in this small county.  A few months in, I was talking with my dad on the phone and was informed that we were yankees.  I hadn't been there but maybe a year when my family began to realize that when I spoke with the people I worked with I spoke with a southern accent.

I could not believe I had started doing this since I was dating the man I am married to now that was a true southerner with a severe southern drawal.  At any rate I had begun to speak with a southern drawal, but only to my colleagues.  I didn't do it with my husband or his family, in fact, I was always trying to correct him for the way he spoke and mispronounced words.

This week I have been learning about communicating with others without having a cultural myopia and to begin to understand the Platinum Rule.  The Platinum Rule is "do to others as they themselves would like to be treated".

According to these there are three strategies I can use to help me communicate more effectively with the people and groups I have identified.   
* I can be more aware of myself and understanding the a dialect or southern drawal are part of a persons culture.
* I can listen to others so that I can understand this language and communicate more efficiently, rather than have a dislike for it.
* I would also like to be aware of the ways in which my speech changes when speaking with others, but more importantly to try and just remain my self in conversation with them.  I would imagine by doing this I would help them to feel more comfortable knowing that my voice did not change only when speaking one on one with a person.

Through listening to others and being accepting of their language differences, I am one more step away from cultural myopia and following the platinum rule.  No one wants to be treated differently based on where they are from or the words that they use to communicate.

I have attached below a little fun survey on the north vs. south that you may wish to use to evaluate yourself.  It's just for fun and as little meaning behind it.  ENJOY!

Are you a Yankee or a Rebel?

Here are what my results told about me, 74% Dixie.  Your neck must be a just little rosy!